#but now I am scared
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god I would be UNSTOPPABLE if I was capable of consistently initiating tasks. just you wait. you'll be waiting a while but just you wait
#executive dysfunction#shitpost#every day I get stuck in waiting mode for SO LONG and SO MANY TIMES#that one time I tried adhd meds it fixed it but then I. was like no I am going to be scared and not continue taking it <3#and also. I simply did not like the psychologist and did not want to have to go back#so. rawdogging the world <3#man if I could start a task right now...then you'd see...then you'd all see....
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everybodys gotta get back into the practice of using pseudonyms online... i remember the time of screen names where u never ever told anyone ur real name and that was just understood as basic internet safety. plus having a screen name is fun because sometimes it sticks so well that it becomes part of ur identity that u can use in whatever facet of ur life you choose. it rocks to pick your own name
#im living proof! i wasnt always called kiwi but now i am and it rocks#but mostly im just worried about all these kids wayyy oversharing personal info online#not to be like aaaggghh kids these days. but.#um people are sharing their full names and schools and deepest secrets with their FACE ATTACHED#i surely dont need to explain why thats scary#tiktok trends where u share stuff you would Never tell people irl.... WITH!!! YOUR FACE!!!!! IN FULL VIEW!!#WHHH.... WHY...........#Get Scared of Internet Strangers Again Please!
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#like am i scared? yes. but i am every single time. and by now i'm coping with cynicism#death of tumblr#id in alt text#the good place#tumblr#mine
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Am I still the person you loved two months ago?
#this isn't a āpoemā about medication#or mental illness really#it's a poem about getting to know someone#one thing I really don't like is how fast love moves#how it's thrown around and attached even in the preliminary stages of the interaction#because#you said you loved me two months ago#when I was quiet and mysterious#(granted inquisitive and brash)#you loved me when I wasn't attached#but now I am scared#now I am Anxious#now I am traumatized#now I trust you (whether I wanted to or not) with Who I Am#and you have to live with that. you have to live with me#do you wish you could go back in time and never meet me?#do you wish that I stayed the same?#do you still love what I've become?#or am I still the person you loved two months ago?#do you love me like you loved me?#vent#anxious avoidant#original poem#poems and poetry
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need to share an experience i had 30 minutes ago
(edit: thanks to @walks-the-ages for providing and reminding me to put alt text, sorry it slips my mind alot lol)
#my hands are still shaking to be quite honest i could not put a lot of effort into this.#but like. brain. why did you do that#literally i have been like hopelessly obsessed with de nonstop thinking abt it for the past couple of days it is Scaring me#it is terminal its soooo fucking chronic#disco elysium#kim kitsuragi#for anyone who wants to know i bumped into some guys car that was stopped for a school bus. i think my brain errored and thought#my foot was fully pressing down on the brake pedal but it wasnt.#i am like 99.99 percent sure neither of us had any major damage to our cars but we still filed a police report just in case#because insurance do be a bitch. dudes back bumper was scratched lightly and my front license plate has a dent now#also literally my first ever car accident that ive had ever yippee yay
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Company Mandated Fancy Fits on the Tulpar š
Also had to include the REAL star of the show (and a bonus)
Based off of this and this. Thank you very much joetastic for being inspirational š
The REAL reason this is late
#just pretend I posted this like 6 days ago šš#<-got distracted#sorry Iām Afflicted with The Curse and everything just takes me a long time#also right now Iām just kind of being experimental with my workflow and style right now so stuff is just naturally taking a bit longer#mouthwashing#mouthwashing fanart#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing anya#nurse anya#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing curly#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#myart#anyway my new years resolution is to put more WOMEN in SUITS and MEN in DRESSES#had fun drawing this but still not too sure about the rendering style just yet. probably just gonna keep playing around with shit#IM DOING IT SCARED but im DOING IT#im also still trying to figure out how to Social Media#am i doing it right#GRAAAHHHHHHH I NEED TO BETTER UNDERSTAND FORMATTING POSTS#i have a more serious mouthwashing piece in the works but wanted to get this done first lol#honestly I have a buncha sketches I should post too#i like them but theyāre not really composited very well if you catch my drift. been having trouble with sketch page layout recently#which is kind of antithetical to the idea of a sketch page but you know how it is with spaghetti#i doodled the others on the side and liked how they looked so i just put some color and basic shading on them#edit: realized i forgot to change the color of the ālapelā on jims shirt lol
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i'm ready to try
#This drawing is kind of personal to me#I recently graduated (CUM LAUDE WOOOO!!!!) and its like. not to get depressing#but when i was younger i was never sure whether i would make it to this point#When i was going through what i consider to still be like. the worst time of my entire life#This fictional character was there for me and she was something for me to latch onto and cope with#eGem helped me a lot with being able to process my emotions at the time but also helped me to reflect on myself#which i think is a big reason as to why I'm really happy with where i am with myself right now#I'm going off to uni next school year to study astronomy!!! which!!!#Im also doing because of eGem!!! She ignited this kind of childlike wonder for space for me#I love doing math and physics and whilst Im still a bit scared because. honestly i don't know whether this is what i want to do with my lif#I think i'll be okay either way#either way i wanted to draw egem again even if i haven't done so in a while because its like#i think i wouldnt be who i am without her. i think i'd be a lot worse off#so like. thank you empires smp thank you geminitay thank you egem This drawing is me expressing my gratitude#AND THANK YOU AUTISM!#empires smp#empires smp s1#empiresblr#esmp#geminitay#art#fanart#alice.art#mcyt#mcytblr#song is andromeda by weyes blood... obv.. you guys know me by now :oP
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august
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#megumi#yuuji#quick bg study based off a picture i took of my mailbox!!! went 2 check the mail thought the light was rly pretty n had a Vision#also fate is cruel and i live surrounded by hydrangea bushes so like . yanno.#exposure therapy and all that#real talk tho i am so well equipped w hydrangea brushes now this took no time at all . u do not scare me anymore.#what did take a long time was getting a fond expression on the TINIEST YUUJI HE IS SO SMALL#HES LIKE 3 PIXELS WIDE#ik its not a char-centric piece but i still wanted his face 2 look okay#and that was so difficult when hes so far in the bg comparatively GJHKGFKJS#i also wanted to caption this w fv lyrics from june gloom#but then i learned that camilla whatshername has a song w th same name and i could not take that risk#my music taste may b questionable but i have standards#anyway uhhhhhh if hell freezes over and some1 recognizes where i live based off itfs loitering by my mailbox pls donot doxx me thank u <3
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my personal fave "luffy holds a mirror up to someone's soul" moments. aka the whole point i think
#guy who is really good at identifying the things you want but are too scared to admit to yourself. hi luffy#its literally the whole point though. i am so charmed by the he wont help until you ask thing. or until you say out loud what you want#ive been ticking them off in my head but i remember getting to sanji's in the anime like HE CANT KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH THIS#one piece#oh god now i have to tag every girl he did this to and sanji. he does ALSO do it to momonusuke but i didn't screen grab that#in a way. i think he does it to ace too but im not ready for that#monkey d. luffy#cat burglar nami#op nami#nico robin#op rebecca#op sanji#black leg sanji#nefertari vivi#alabasta#dressrosa#whole cake island#enies lobby#arlong park
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where my inspiration took me tonight...
#ts4#the sims 4#sims 4#sims 4 screenshots#*mine#sims interior#simblr#sims community#the sims community#sims 4 interior#ts4 interior#ahhh i'm really happy with this (now i am scared since my first builds with any ep are usually jinxed as in corrupted)#hope this won't be the case#sims 4 lovestruck
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Make me sick
#i saw them in trailer#for lantern rite#and now I can't stop thinking abt them#oooh.. guhhh.. love them...#my art#genshin impact#genshinimpact#tighnari#genshin impact tighnari#cyno#genshin impact cyno#don't tag as ship#thank you#i associate them w my friendship with my beloved friends but also good time I have with my brothers#and everytime they appear I AM SCARED of fanservice.#i won't forgive hyv for ignoring Cyno's backstory just to put in his second qiest āoh they were classmateā#and I still didn't forgive how they ruin one my fave character which is Gorou#please hoyoverse... š#anyway i didn't see if there will be collei#i hope they will at least mention her...!
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there are a lot of evil people in the world and a lot of darkness in the world and so itās very important for me to stress that now more than ever is the time to spread kindness and compassion. combat the evil by not only not partaking in it, but actively refuting it. destroy the notion that being compassionate or generous or kind to someone is uncool or embarrassing or even scary. be the change you want to see. start a chain reaction. positivity only breeds more positivity. do an act of kindness for someone so that that person who is too afraid to do it themselves can see you, realize that theyāre not alone, and perhaps sheepishly follow your example. and then the next person who is too afraid but sees that person can do the same. when bad news comes out about bad people or horrible atrocities in the world itās such an easy impulse to despair, and obviously itās important to feel what you need to feel. grieve. be angry. be sorrowful. be empathetic. but dust off your pants and get up and be a part of a chain reaction that, no matter how small the scale, and spread compassion and love and care. all the reasons why you might notāāitās hard! itās scary! people will make fun of me! itās useless because thereās too much evil!ā are all grade A arguments as to why you should. you have no idea how many people you could inspire to do the same. even if it doesnāt get you anyway far, you can at least say you have the nobility of trying. please choose love and please choose life. you are worth loving and you are worth inspiring others to love
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kaito screencap redraw! plus my favorite panel from the scarlet return arc lol
I've been reading detco for like 2 years and the unhealthy obsession fanart motivation finally caught up
(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)
#my art#artists on tumblr#fanart#digital art#dcmk#detective conan#detco#case closed#kaitou kid#magic kaito#kuroba kaito#first pirates and now thieves#why is it always the fictional wanted criminals that get to me#although i must say#itās objectively not a great time to get into this fandom#cousin gateā¦#i watched from up on poppy hill right after i found out about it and i was so scared lol#like please. you canāt do this to me twice in a row#been sketching a lot and not finishing anything lately (art block??)#so ty kaito for pulling through#guys i cant believe he stars in 2 shows#am i crazy or does he kind of resemble oikawa#oh and that last panel always makes me laugh#stay silly
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the fact that kevin day also witnessed a man being chopped up in the tower at evermore after neilās audition is mad, and itās something that is very much not addressed ever. like, maybe part of kevin was so accepting of how things were in the nest because he knew that this is the second branch, and if he were to leave, heād become the main branchās problem because he knows too much, and the main branch casually chops men up as a warning to literal children. and then heās still called a coward for leaving ?? but also a coward for wanting to go back to make the inevitable less painful for him ??? and thatās not even considering what riko and tetusji did to him specifically, before even jean arrived at the nest. and his motherās death wouldāve been quite recent at that point. just insane.
#like iām pretty sure the man being chopped up was the final straw for mary to take neil and run#and kevin saw that and wasnāt allowed to leave#so he accepted that maybe where he is is the better of two options and decided itļæ½ļæ½ļæ½s okay because at least he gets to play exy#so exy became his only escape because if he was so scared that if he were to leave the nest heād be the next one given to the butcher#itās not until he doesnāt have exy anymore cause riko took it from him that he leaves#god i have so many thoughts but i am going to stop now#aftg#all for the game#kevin day#neil josten#so youāll believe that neil was scared of nathan for a good reason but wonāt believe kevin was scared of riko for good reason#(i said iād stop but i did not)#and tetsuji#like even in tsc kevin is still calling tetsuji the master without hesitation
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Huevember: Day 3 - Amber Stalker šļøš²š
#huevember#huevember 2024#fanart#art#digital art#artist on tumblr#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#bill cipher#dipper pines#mabel pines#dipper and mabel#waddles#i am stepping so far out of my comfort zone with doing backgrounds i never ever do backgrounds they scare me#but i do really want to learn them#and i have to accept that in the process of learning something i am going to have to suck at it :)#i don't hate how this came out though#things i could have done better but opted to push forward and just get it done#improving my speed was another reason why i decided to do this so#rambling now :(#I FREAKIN FORGOR TO TITLE THIS
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so much happened in this whole episode but iām still on fig infiltrating rubenās dream, making it look like the place where his friend was murdered, and then disguising herself as kipperlilly & repeatedly saying different variants of āsomebody needs to take the fall for this, and itās not going to be me. itās going to be you.ā while adaine as the elven oracle shows up next to her. can you imagine waking up from that, the idea of a horrible truth being pinned on you by your friend to save her own skin while the personification of fate and destiny stands there, almost as a promise that this is GOING to happen to you. we donāt even know if this kid is guilty. my god.
#fantasy high#dimension 20#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high junior year#fig faeth#ruben hopclap#lucy frostblade#the rat grinders#adaine abernant#kipperlilly copperkettle#watching fig terrorize him like girl!!! we donāt even know if heās guilty!!!!#this might just be for me but i do not think 5 teenagers willingly brutally killed their friend idk#like there just has to be some other element to it and i am very scared to find out what that was#what if they were put in a position where they felt there was/there was no other choiceā¦ like oh my god#my comedy brain is having fun but my āthis is a teenagerā brain is in such deep distress all the time this season#the rat grinders i trust brennan to not make u cartoonishly evil so i am holding u as gently as i can in my confused shaky hands#also with the devilās nectar iāve been wondering why they all seem so well-adjusted & now iām curious if theyāve been intentionally-#changing their memories in a way so that either the trauma is lesser or they think they arenāt guilty. idk#but it seems like from how gertie was talking she was making it more recently so the well adjustedness from early jy doesnāt quite add up#they could have another source maybe??? idk iām just low stakes 4 a.m. spitballing here#thereās also the strong possibility that theyāre aware of what happened but they werenāt the ones who killed lucy. idk who knows#the way you could probably devilās nectar yourself into believing it wasnāt your fault someone diedā¦ CRAZY IMPLICATIONS!!! CRAZY IDEA!!!#anyways the bad kids & the rat grinders donāt ever have to like each other but i do wonder if at least some of those kids deserve a chance
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